Simplify - Be Kind
Extend kindness to yourself - embrace the essence of simplicity.
I've said this many times, and it means a lot to me: these posts are not meant to pressure you. Instead, this blog is intended to uplift and support you in your daily life. Think of the tips as tools to adapt to your unique journey, not as rigid laws.
Be kind to yourself!
In the realm of parenting, where every day brings its challenges: From sleep deprivation to illness to seemingly uncooperative children, the gift of compassion is needed. These are the moments when your to-do list should take a back seat. Recognize that not every battle is won in a single day, a principle that applies equally to parenting. Whether you're navigating the delicate stage of a newborn, moving house or country, or feeling emotionally drained:
Be kind to yourself!
Whether you're managing three toddlers, feeling overwhelmed with a single child, coping with physical health challenges, dealing with a child with special needs, or facing wider family issues:
Be kind to yourself!
The struggles we face are many and varied, known and unknown. Yet we share a common need: to be kind to ourselves, to be compassionate, and to stop being our enemy.
Women often have the toxic quality of being at war with themselves. It's like a self-inflicted attack that starts with slaps and escalates to kicks, leaving our bodies and minds exhausted.
In this internal battle, our thoughts echo with poisonous words of inadequacy and constant failure. How often do we allow ourselves to become mentally exhausted by expecting too much? This is not to say that change or improvement is inappropriate; it is simply an argument for being kinder to yourself.
Consider the power of words - words that breathe life into our homes, shape our children, and nurture growth. We understand the impact of positive affirmation on kids and even plants, yet we neglect the importance of extending the same to ourselves.
There's a better way!
Let's look at it from a different perspective. What promotes effective teamwork in a professional setting? While I acknowledge that a workplace is different from a home, drawing parallels can sometimes help us.
Consider a few strategies:
Recognition and Appreciation: Acknowledge and appreciate team members' efforts. Publicly recognize contributions to boost morale.
For yourself, cultivate a habit of regularly appreciating your efforts and achievements. Achievement in parenting may be challenging to quantify, but in household tasks, it's more tangible. Start a journal to record weekly appreciations and shift the focus away from destructive thought patterns.
Set Clear Goals: Define clear goals and individual roles. Establish achievable milestones, celebrating successes along the way.
One of my favorite topics - goals and vision. “Without vision, my people perish”, and this applies to a family or an individual. Have you documented your family goals? If not, be kind to yourself and schedule time to work on it. If yes, how about your daily, weekly, and yearly goals? Take time to find a balance between writing down tasks and dreaming. At the end of the week, the end of the month, or the end of the year, you can have a review and a celebration.
Provide Learning Opportunities: Support continuous learning and skill development, just as in a professional setting.
For us, this translated into parenting classes, online courses, or books. Anything that facilitated ongoing learning. Apply this concept at home - attend classes, read, or engage in mentorship programs.
Applying principles from the workplace to our homes can be transformative. Just as we don't expect professional success without understanding the dynamics of our work environment, we can't anticipate seamless family life without learning the various phases of parenting or navigating the intricacies of the husband-wife relationship. Personally, without continuous learning, I would have felt entirely lost in the realm of parenthood. Consider the value of ongoing education and seek encouragement.
If this isn't the season for formal classes, consider informal opportunities. Connect with another family where you can openly ask questions and share experiences. Once you feel more comfortable and less overwhelmed, take the step to enroll in a class or mentorship program. Investing in knowledge and seeking guidance can greatly enhance your journey through the complex and rewarding landscape of family life. We are not left alone to figure out this journey of parenting.
Flexibility and Adaptability: Embracing Flexibility and Adaptability is crucial both in the professional and parenting realms. In the workplace, being open to flexible work arrangements and understanding personal and professional challenges fosters a positive work-life balance. Similarly, in parenting, flexibility is paramount.
Understanding this concept in parenting has been a valuable lesson for me. I've realized that my attitude significantly influences the outcome, especially when I acknowledge that things may not always go as planned. Letting go of control is a significant challenge for mothers. In parenting, we quickly discover that we're not in full control; there are too many variables at play. However, we find comfort in knowing that we serve God, who holds all things in His hands. It can be a challenging but essential act to surrender our independence and become dependent on Him.
Regular Feedback: Provide constructive feedback regularly, recognizing strengths and offering guidance for improvement.
If you're part of a community of like-minded moms, this is the place for honest feedback. While compliments are valuable, growth often comes from sincere and constructive feedback.
Celebrate Milestones: Celebrating both individual and collective achievements is a powerful practice in parenting. While we often honor birthdays and big events, we sometimes overlook celebrating the small victories of everyday parenting. It's important to take the family out or create special moments to acknowledge not only the end goals but also the steps and progress along the way. Embracing the whole process communicates to our children that we value the journey in a culture that typically emphasizes only the end goals.
Promote Well-Being: Supporting the well-being of your family is similar to ensuring a healthy and happy team. We've discussed the importance of being kind to yourself; now it's crucial to identify and address your specific needs. Whether it's more sleep, dedicated alone time, a spa day, a coffee date, fresh flowers, or a quiet reading session, incorporate these elements into your weekly routine. Self-care should be an ongoing practice, not just an occasional effort. Choose one aspect and begin to integrate it into your life, fostering a culture of wellness in your family.
One-on-one meetings: In the parenting journey, the concept of a "one-on-one meeting" finds resonance in seeking guidance, wisdom, and insight from Holy Spirit.
Turning to the Holy Spirit serves as a profound and constant source of wisdom. This divine relationship offers a living stream of fresh insights, like prophetic words, that are transformative in navigating the challenges and joys of parenting.
The Holy Spirit, often referred to as the Comforter and Counselor, has promised to guide us into all truth. His divine guidance becomes a cornerstone. Make it a daily practice to connect with His voice, read His Word, and hear what He has to say about you. Then you cannot contradict it throughout the day.
These tools provide a starting point, a foundation upon which to build. Remember, the key is to be kind to yourself throughout this journey. Take one step at a time, understanding that each step, no matter how small, is a significant accomplishment. Encourage yourself with life-giving words, recognizing the effort and growth embedded in each step.
The Simplify entries are meant to be tools for empowerment, not a rigid code. They are meant to inspire, guide, and adapt to your unique circumstances. Reflect on any self-imposed pressures and reevaluate whether they align with your authentic self and your aspirations. If necessary, accept a well-intentioned nudge offered with love and understanding.
Be kind to yourself!
This compassionate approach isn't just for your benefit; it has a profound effect on your children. They see you embracing and accepting yourself, fostering a culture of self-love that naturally extends to others. By embodying kindness, you're not only shaping your own story, you're creating a legacy of love and acceptance that reverberates through generations.
Be kind to yourself!
Now I'm going to be kind to myself and take a break from blogging twice a week, maybe I'll come back in the future, but until then, I'm going to be blogging once a week again.